I'm Getting Married
A week ago I found this TED talk (they're starting to become an obsession of mine) and I fell in love. The video is called "The person you really need to marry" and it's given by Tracy McMillan, a television writer and love expert. If you don't have 14 minutes to watch it, you're too busy. But here are some of the main points:
1. The person you really need to marry is yourself
2. Forget the past, put away the future, and love yourself for who you are in this moment
3. Too many people say things like "When I lose 10 pounds, then I'll love myself" or "Well, I would love myself, but I dated so-and-so and that was really dumb, so I can't love myself." We shouldn't look at ourselves this way
4. Love every part of you- even the parts that are making mistakes and being worked on
5. Things don't go the way we want, but we have to promise that we will always stay with ourselves and not leave ourselves behind
So yes, I am getting married...to myself. That is the cheesiest thing and sounds really feminist-y and cliche. But it empowered me for 14 minutes and I haven't stopped thinking about it since. Especially because I'm a human being with a lot of cautions and guards, this lesson taught me that I can't blame myself for the choices I've made. Well, I can, but I don't want to. Decisions determine destiny and they shape your character, but I believe I am more than the things I have done. But then why do people say that actions speak the loudest? I still have lots of figuring out to do, but the first thing I am going to do is love Jenna. Even when it's hard, even when I'm my own biggest excuse or failure or scapegoat. Even when Jenna doesn't feel so Jenna, she is.
You're all invited to the wedding (haha this is so dumb), but I'm not going to leave myself when it gets hard. And one day, when I get married married, for realzees, I'll be glad that the real Jenna came along too, the one that loves life and learning and the one that loves who she is and Whose she is.
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