A new ending.

Tomorrow is the first day of high school. Senior year, that is. To be honest, I am more scared of this year than any other. Except probably freshman, that was a wreck. I'm sure all my friends are in "relaxed" mode and are smooth sailing to the finish line, but I, being the sentimental snapshot freak, am in over my head. I wrote this a few nights ago, and I think it's a perfect summary of my worries and fears that come along with saying goodbye to my temporary home. Here we go:

"Last year of school? I'm not going to be corny, but where did the time go? Is there some massive, brown and moldy treasure trunk in a musty attic somewhere that contains the minutes and moments of my high school years? Did all the history notes and gum wrappers disappear from the bottom of my always-bulging shoulder bag? Did my laughs fill up a balloon like helium and fly away to...Neverland? Where does everything go?

Do I really have faith in myself? Just because I will be busy does not mean I will succeed. Should I really worry about three months of tennis, spanish projects, or a prom dress when I soon will be worrying about four months of living alone, around-the-house projects, and a wedding dress? When I throw my hat in the air (even thought I won't because I'll lose it), what will I be feeling? Pain? Relief? Emptiness? High school is not life, nor does it prepare you for it. 

This is a place for stress, sleepless nights, loneliness, success, broken hearts, more stress, and a whole lot of change. To be completely honest, I could be a freshman still. And I'm so glad I kept a part of that with me. Three years went by in three seconds, and my fourth will be wild. It is time to lose myself in the wild and let time surprise me again. Ready or not....here I come.